Welcome to one of the only pages on this site where I actually use capital letters!
Also, one of the pages where my black-background-white-text is the *most* straining to look at. Remember to use the toggle button in the upper-right, it might help!

This page is essentially just... my own writing. Where my rambles page is often just me saying literally whatever all the time, this page will most likely not be updated that much at all. It's more for longer thoughts and discussing stuff like identity and sexuality and whatever else that I want to write a mini-essay on.

I should stress that this isn't necessarily a vent page, even if it might seem like that at times. This is strictly for stuff I need to put out there before it boils my brain and I don't like only spilling negativity onto the screen, y'know?
And hopefully you already gathered this from every other page on the site but... I tend to have comprehension issues and my ramblings aren't the most coherent; my writing is definitely stattered and my word choices can be weird so don't expect a well-written novel is all I'm saying.
  • I don't feel welcome in online asexual spaces and - seeing as how most of them act - that's totally fine with me. // Originally written November 17th, 2023
    • I know it's not uncommon for people to feel alienated or disconnected from their peers and while I sort of have those feelings when it comes to talking online to other trans people and people with my interests, I never feel nearly as consistantly detached from any community than I do when I talk to other asexuals.

      So *so* many ace people online will say the most blatant in-your-face puritan shit ever in reply to any level of sexual post but the moment you call them out on it they claim that you're aphobic. It's actually kind of shocking how many I've talked to that are so tone-deaf on this and view any form of sexual content or discussion about sex as a personal attack... It's baffling even moreso when they get angry about exclusionism but refuse to understand that sex is and always has been an important part of LGBT history and by speaking up with negativity, snarkiness, or repulsion at anything they see in regards to sex they are demonizing it and almost always spit out homophobic rhetoric.

      What I find really confusing is that an acceptance and acknowledgement of asexual people and asexuality is, in itself, sex-positive. Understanding that sexuality/sexual attraction is something people can and do experience differently - sometimes not experiencing at all or being unable to experience - is sex-positive.

      This type of thing isn't just limited to asexuals, obviously. Where I feel that it should be a no-brainer for asexuals to at the very least be willing to pursue a healthy relationship and mindset regarding sex and sex-positivity, it should also be a no-brainer for transmascs to hold feminist values and understand that their perspective of toxic masculinity and misogyny is a uniquity they have over cis men. And yet...

      Anyways discussing myself regarding sexuality/asexuality is always really hard for me to do and I have trouble putting my identity and experience into words... I'd love to find a way to explain it someday in a way that feels adequate enough.
  • A discussion about Transmasculinity and Misogyny // Originally written December 7th, 2023
    • TBD
  • N/A -